Trigger warning... SI and dark feelings below... Just an FYI for anyone needing a warning. Love Ya

You know the feeling....

Something happens that you were hoping wouldn’t… and it feels like your heart just dropped into your stomach. Or a crazy dull or even sharp ache that feels like a literal Pit of Despair is open in the center of the chest.

UGH...

This feeling has plagued me off and on seemly my entire life. It was always worse when someone stabbed me in the back (figuratively... but it certainly FELT literal…), was gaslit when seeking help for various things, and more. It would really open up when my suicidal ideations came up front and center in my mind.

Sometimes it felt like a hole that led into the void of existence. Other times it felt like an angry ocean of Sorrow that threatened to drown me in overwhelming emotions. When I really began healing, I noticed it shifted into feeling like soft earth… very similar to a freshly filled in grave. At least I hoped it was filled in. As opposed to a freshly dug one just for me.

I gave these feelings to the artist I commissioned for this project. Abby from Actually Owltistic created this demon-like entity with a hole in it’s chest. The arms are those who are trying to reach out for help, but so hopeless they can’t seem to find it.

You can check out more of her artwork at https://actuallyowltistic.com/

Here is what she was envisioning with this artwork:” For me definitely feeling cosmic, like the universe itself is against me. When I feel hopeless, I feel small like the small hands reaching out into space towards nothingness. It's such a difficult head "space" to get out of because the feeling is everywhere and all at once. I did its horns drooping too like a sad animal. The monster embodies this sadness after all. And this sad feeling is so large hence why you don't see its entire body. It's just too large.“

I LOVE her interpretation as I have felt those same feelings throughout my life too. It can be So Difficult to even Name these emotions, let alone draw them or put a face to them!

So Why Do It????

When we give our Shadows a face, it can become less intimidating, less stressful to face. We can look at it and tell it to “Fuck Off!” if we want too. I will do this in meditation. It helps to have something to look at to help us create that identity in our minds while meditating. When we allow ourselves to hear them, to give them a voice, we can understand what we need to help reduce these “Pit of Despair” type feelings. Sometimes writing out the ideas that come up when we sit and decide to give that part of us a voice also helps. These are some steps on how we can Take Back Our Power. More tips and tools to come soon too.

I will be making a backstory and character sheet for this Shadow as a Villain to face in my Therapeutic Dungeons and Dragons Style Games soon too!! I can’t wait to introduce more as we get them illustrated channel a personality for each of these!!

More to come soon.

Try out talking to your Hopelessness as if they were this Creature. Explore what this part of you has to say and find out exactly what it needs to help YOU. Explore, get curious and then do something fun or lighthearted for You. Only, and I stress ONLY, if you feel safe enough to do so.

Hopelessness can be a hugely overwhelming feeling. If this feels too big for you, too triggering…. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND you finding a good Counselor who can aid in this. Having that Support is HUGE in the Healing Process…. Even though it can be terrifying trying to find one who is a good fit for us… and opening that can of worms…. IT IS HELPFUL IN SO MANY WAYS!!

Making a Solid Support System is Huge in ANY type of Healing. I know that isn’t something everyone has, so we have to go out and find it… And Yes, that seems extremely daunting at first. I know… Been there. Over and Over again. But It Is So Worth it! You Are So Worth It!!!!

Me and People like me, are here to help too. We Do Not Replace counselors by any means. I am here to Support the work done in Therapy and Counseling sessions. The techniques I teach help support and get us through the day to day. My Energy Healing is a Huge Help too. I will Never claim it will replace the Healing that a quality Counselor can facilitate… it Assists and Augments it. Me and People like me are great additions to your Support System.

I Love You. I Support You.

Always Remember,
You Are Loved,
You Are Valid,
You Are Accepted.

Love,

Interested in adding Coaching and/or Energy Healing to help you?

Go to: https://healingcraftcoaching.com/services